Gaze
The sand raked my skin as I crawled to the foreground of my inner sanctums
where I only found a reflection of myself
The sand raked my skin as I crawled to the foreground of my inner sanctums
where I only found a reflection of myself
Plea
I make every lyric you,
you are my art and take my mind away,
when I'm down in the heavy I don't really feel you,
but as I escape up to you I flee,
despicable me for my forever need,
craving to explore thee,
come to me,
even if only in those sweet dreams.
I make every lyric you,
you are my art and take my mind away,
when I'm down in the heavy I don't really feel you,
but as I escape up to you I flee,
despicable me for my forever need,
craving to explore thee,
come to me,
even if only in those sweet dreams.
Flood
Still in deepest love with the nightmare that broke her at the seams,
docile mind caressed with a whisper under cloak of night,
vamps would envy for the willing victims of he,
arrived in haste it seems,
didn't count on her screams from the grave,
pulsing through his cold veins,
when he bit her she took his reigns,
now with just a silent moment of peace,
he is flooded with her endless pains.
Still in deepest love with the nightmare that broke her at the seams,
docile mind caressed with a whisper under cloak of night,
vamps would envy for the willing victims of he,
arrived in haste it seems,
didn't count on her screams from the grave,
pulsing through his cold veins,
when he bit her she took his reigns,
now with just a silent moment of peace,
he is flooded with her endless pains.
Cement
A wound that never scars,
dripping only black ink,
poisoning the surrounds,
weakening the roots of all that is good,
the throbbing pulse of the unclean,
gripping death from the unseen,
eyes in the dark... glistening,
focusing,
the pavement and it's spaces,
shards of faces,
garbled sections of life,
that never will mean anything,
except to remind me of you and I.
A wound that never scars,
dripping only black ink,
poisoning the surrounds,
weakening the roots of all that is good,
the throbbing pulse of the unclean,
gripping death from the unseen,
eyes in the dark... glistening,
focusing,
the pavement and it's spaces,
shards of faces,
garbled sections of life,
that never will mean anything,
except to remind me of you and I.
Worse Than
Worse than going was leaving myself there too,
as I stumbled along,
and back, tucked away in the fray were my eyes that warmed,
the attention that swarmed,
I went into it with all existence around,
I left it forgetting even that I couldn't be found,
anymore,
only trace was the deadness in gaze and the ice in the space...
What was it I did?
Spark of realization of having hid,
apex of betrayal to have vanished before your further expectations,
to have murdered all temptations,
before even out of the womb,
of a girl,
back there,
feeling care,
life in her stare,
everything to share,
can't seem to be found ever again anywhere.
Worse than going was leaving myself there too,
as I stumbled along,
and back, tucked away in the fray were my eyes that warmed,
the attention that swarmed,
I went into it with all existence around,
I left it forgetting even that I couldn't be found,
anymore,
only trace was the deadness in gaze and the ice in the space...
What was it I did?
Spark of realization of having hid,
apex of betrayal to have vanished before your further expectations,
to have murdered all temptations,
before even out of the womb,
of a girl,
back there,
feeling care,
life in her stare,
everything to share,
can't seem to be found ever again anywhere.
Grasping at Circles
Forever is a long time,
don't you think maybe you'll change your mind?
Would it scare you if I said no?
Wouldn't know how to take it but I'd believe it,
'cause you seem so certain...
of things I may never understand.
Just follow and you'll see,
the rest of it will start to taste bland.
Forever is a long time,
don't you think maybe you'll change your mind?
Would it scare you if I said no?
Wouldn't know how to take it but I'd believe it,
'cause you seem so certain...
of things I may never understand.
Just follow and you'll see,
the rest of it will start to taste bland.
Everything
Told you not to scare you...
so you could behold just for once out of my lying teeth,
an answer,
of what you meant to me,
what our precious time made me have to face,
frightened you into shadows,
immeasurable distance,
so endless to my senses,
often have hated that I couldn't relegate it,
wait for the moment to pass without saying a word...
should've paused and zipped it back in the body bag where it lay,
a few strung together pieces of my shackles sealed my fate,
I was looking out from the danger zone and clawing at my remains,
nothing quite so real I'm sure,
as to see my thoughts screaming out for you to help release me,
night quietly ended in haste,
that's where it all laid to waste,
regret in no longer having that space,
the price of the brave,
with just the smallest taste of what I had to say,
lost everything that day.
Told you not to scare you...
so you could behold just for once out of my lying teeth,
an answer,
of what you meant to me,
what our precious time made me have to face,
frightened you into shadows,
immeasurable distance,
so endless to my senses,
often have hated that I couldn't relegate it,
wait for the moment to pass without saying a word...
should've paused and zipped it back in the body bag where it lay,
a few strung together pieces of my shackles sealed my fate,
I was looking out from the danger zone and clawing at my remains,
nothing quite so real I'm sure,
as to see my thoughts screaming out for you to help release me,
night quietly ended in haste,
that's where it all laid to waste,
regret in no longer having that space,
the price of the brave,
with just the smallest taste of what I had to say,
lost everything that day.
So fucked up,
so very fucked up...
oh so fucked up,
but never fucked.
so very fucked up...
oh so fucked up,
but never fucked.
Untouchable
Never near so as to keep this perfection pristine,
my poison was not in our cards,
we would stay as a pure running stream.
To taint this whole reality
would have been obscene,
one can dream but in the end,
the dead end was all I ever intended it to be.
You are untouched by my cruelties and petty earthly needs,
my ways never allowed to germinate nor spread their craven seeds,
I can call on you in the swamp from amongst those bloodied reeds,
I can face myself and our purity,
still blessed with this rarity.
Never near so as to keep this perfection pristine,
my poison was not in our cards,
we would stay as a pure running stream.
To taint this whole reality
would have been obscene,
one can dream but in the end,
the dead end was all I ever intended it to be.
You are untouched by my cruelties and petty earthly needs,
my ways never allowed to germinate nor spread their craven seeds,
I can call on you in the swamp from amongst those bloodied reeds,
I can face myself and our purity,
still blessed with this rarity.
Tranquility
At a certain kind of peace now,
you've seen all you needed to see,
it's all that could be asked,
in this dead end resolve I shall calmly bask,
stale trail of crumbs led right to thee and me,
now we can rest our weary heads,
let's just let it be,
continue forward as the best versions of ourselves,
making things grow and watering the ground,
it'll do,
it'll have to do,
ordinary,
nothing extraordinary,
we are safe now,
nothing profound.
At a certain kind of peace now,
you've seen all you needed to see,
it's all that could be asked,
in this dead end resolve I shall calmly bask,
stale trail of crumbs led right to thee and me,
now we can rest our weary heads,
let's just let it be,
continue forward as the best versions of ourselves,
making things grow and watering the ground,
it'll do,
it'll have to do,
ordinary,
nothing extraordinary,
we are safe now,
nothing profound.
Shrine
Rush of relief as you see me,
you see all I ever wanted to be,
in this shrine of fragmented memories,
maybe there was pain,
but we both know that pleasure can't be erased.
Rush of relief as you see me,
you see all I ever wanted to be,
in this shrine of fragmented memories,
maybe there was pain,
but we both know that pleasure can't be erased.
Meanings
Seemed everyone's a best friend till you came along,
whoring out my attention like it was going out of style,
then something strange,
then a change,
never thought to say it,
no one would ever have even known it,
not really a sign in sight,
one might even venture if we had existed,
but if the apocalypse battered down our doors,
or came anticipation of exit stage left in wars,
you'd hear all about it,
from out of the blue,
a message only to you,
an essence of that seemingly over worn cliche,
but it belongs in only that place,
where you and I lay face to face,
with you my idea seemed to find it's final resting place,
never needed to look further, not for even a trace,
never an urge to match it,
because I'm satiated with you,
we are known and loved through and through,
the thirst is never for another,
absence, the only sensation left to smother.
Seemed everyone's a best friend till you came along,
whoring out my attention like it was going out of style,
then something strange,
then a change,
never thought to say it,
no one would ever have even known it,
not really a sign in sight,
one might even venture if we had existed,
but if the apocalypse battered down our doors,
or came anticipation of exit stage left in wars,
you'd hear all about it,
from out of the blue,
a message only to you,
an essence of that seemingly over worn cliche,
but it belongs in only that place,
where you and I lay face to face,
with you my idea seemed to find it's final resting place,
never needed to look further, not for even a trace,
never an urge to match it,
because I'm satiated with you,
we are known and loved through and through,
the thirst is never for another,
absence, the only sensation left to smother.
Artist Within
Clawing to break free,
drowned aching stagnancy,
unsheathe,
that weapon of you,
a push toward the mundane,
they couldn't savour the full scope of what you gave,
behave,
so they wouldn't feel the cravings of all they couldn't take,
the aesthetic rape,
not all of us are that way,
some would never dream of making an escape,
whether endless skies or gloomy caves,
want your shoals and waves,
this vessel grows in your wake.
Clawing to break free,
drowned aching stagnancy,
unsheathe,
that weapon of you,
a push toward the mundane,
they couldn't savour the full scope of what you gave,
behave,
so they wouldn't feel the cravings of all they couldn't take,
the aesthetic rape,
not all of us are that way,
some would never dream of making an escape,
whether endless skies or gloomy caves,
want your shoals and waves,
this vessel grows in your wake.
On and On
Horizons pale,
stale,
encounter overload,
the physical and everything swirling around and in between,
never to recover from your overlord,
you'd see how lightening would taste encapsulated in your mind,
you'd shudder as the electrical storm helped you to recover,
from all your fears of feeling,
you'd wish it'd end as hard as you'd beg again for the beginning,
enter the circle from which timeless reality cries,
where the rules are laid aside,
where you don't need to hide,
it's where I reside,
it's on the other side,
of weakness,
of impartiality,
it's decision with blade precision,
leaves an invisible,
non-divisible incision.
Horizons pale,
stale,
encounter overload,
the physical and everything swirling around and in between,
never to recover from your overlord,
you'd see how lightening would taste encapsulated in your mind,
you'd shudder as the electrical storm helped you to recover,
from all your fears of feeling,
you'd wish it'd end as hard as you'd beg again for the beginning,
enter the circle from which timeless reality cries,
where the rules are laid aside,
where you don't need to hide,
it's where I reside,
it's on the other side,
of weakness,
of impartiality,
it's decision with blade precision,
leaves an invisible,
non-divisible incision.
Balance
Let's stop walking that tightrope shall we?
Never knew there was another option, wish someone had told me... guess never fell to my death yet so I'm not held back with regrets...
Just ease off that plank, if you look down you'll see what I mean.
Never mattered to you before but now why so worried? Where you going in a hurry?
Just care for you so wanted you to know the value of all this before the pavement hits... just stay safe and out of harms way.
Well if I'm walking in the lion's den and you're still around, well then, you must see something profound or perhaps you like when your pulse quickens... maybe like when my eyes sicken... intoxicated by the dangers that never lose their pull...
I just worry that you will meet your end and that I won't be able to protect your fall. Would rather you stay well than be part of any downfall.
But isn't that why you love me? Ingrained violations of everything ordinarily sacrosanct making my breed seem almost extinct... admit it, you never wanted me any other way, if you could've seen I would survive it you'd have had your way. But...if you could've remembered me you would know that I can live through anything,
in the final chapter the last one always standing,
awake,
true to the place she began,
turning hardest rock to sand.
Let's stop walking that tightrope shall we?
Never knew there was another option, wish someone had told me... guess never fell to my death yet so I'm not held back with regrets...
Just ease off that plank, if you look down you'll see what I mean.
Never mattered to you before but now why so worried? Where you going in a hurry?
Just care for you so wanted you to know the value of all this before the pavement hits... just stay safe and out of harms way.
Well if I'm walking in the lion's den and you're still around, well then, you must see something profound or perhaps you like when your pulse quickens... maybe like when my eyes sicken... intoxicated by the dangers that never lose their pull...
I just worry that you will meet your end and that I won't be able to protect your fall. Would rather you stay well than be part of any downfall.
But isn't that why you love me? Ingrained violations of everything ordinarily sacrosanct making my breed seem almost extinct... admit it, you never wanted me any other way, if you could've seen I would survive it you'd have had your way. But...if you could've remembered me you would know that I can live through anything,
in the final chapter the last one always standing,
awake,
true to the place she began,
turning hardest rock to sand.
Solitude
Painting myself over with you,
now I'm perfect within and without,
so lost as to be found,
so alone in surround sound.
Painting myself over with you,
now I'm perfect within and without,
so lost as to be found,
so alone in surround sound.
Burn
It became more real than the room I sat in tonight.
The fascination and always tugging to be drawn in.
This has happened before but you mistook another for that girl on the merry-go-round,
lucky her,
but this already occurred,
but I, not her, was at the other end of the rope,
back then,
losing hope,
that our game would end.
A scream through tears begged you to teach me how to shut it off and show me how not to feel,
so I could be like you,
my stone idol,
so cold,
show me, I cried, how you made it seem so real,
I wanted to be you so I would be able to turn off the singular craving and just let the others in line in,
ended up that the more things I tried to change, the more I stayed exactly the same,
world deranged,
such a pretty face but satan lurked behind it,
didn't want to face a world without you in it,
sinnister darkness beset me and I couldn't shake it,
so true to the reality that I couldn't live another day,
so I ran into that wall, the one where we used to play,
before puberty set in,
only to express the true depth of my loss and regret...
instead of saying a lot I guess I'd said nothing much at all,
prom queen mangled at that bloody wall,
that bloody wall,
all of seventeen,
sweet teenage dreams,
watching your face as you remembered her screams,
knowing you'd ripped her at all her seams,
there was no maybe or in betweens,
the game was dead and gone,
she'd said so long,
but the burn was on her yet,
when she'd awoken...
to a later time,
to the fact that he was around,
and never recognized it was her his gaze had found,
and as the moment passed as ordinary,
she knew what was worse than that bloody wall,
never having him recall.
It became more real than the room I sat in tonight.
The fascination and always tugging to be drawn in.
This has happened before but you mistook another for that girl on the merry-go-round,
lucky her,
but this already occurred,
but I, not her, was at the other end of the rope,
back then,
losing hope,
that our game would end.
A scream through tears begged you to teach me how to shut it off and show me how not to feel,
so I could be like you,
my stone idol,
so cold,
show me, I cried, how you made it seem so real,
I wanted to be you so I would be able to turn off the singular craving and just let the others in line in,
ended up that the more things I tried to change, the more I stayed exactly the same,
world deranged,
such a pretty face but satan lurked behind it,
didn't want to face a world without you in it,
sinnister darkness beset me and I couldn't shake it,
so true to the reality that I couldn't live another day,
so I ran into that wall, the one where we used to play,
before puberty set in,
only to express the true depth of my loss and regret...
instead of saying a lot I guess I'd said nothing much at all,
prom queen mangled at that bloody wall,
that bloody wall,
all of seventeen,
sweet teenage dreams,
watching your face as you remembered her screams,
knowing you'd ripped her at all her seams,
there was no maybe or in betweens,
the game was dead and gone,
she'd said so long,
but the burn was on her yet,
when she'd awoken...
to a later time,
to the fact that he was around,
and never recognized it was her his gaze had found,
and as the moment passed as ordinary,
she knew what was worse than that bloody wall,
never having him recall.
Play
I just want to meet you where the art takes us,
let yourself go...
for me...
the worst that may occur has already gone down,
you see...we're no longer around,
we're down here on the ground,
dying from suffocation,
deprivation of ferocity,
but,
I need your velocity,
I need you just as you were back then...as you are now,
skip the watered down version of all you'd never want to say anyway,
tell me about nothing that matters out there but tell it to me and mean it,
and all I'll cherish is that you sent it,
like I always have,
write again and make it so,
speak again and make it glow,
those times spent worlds away,
I was bored of this one anyway,
you rescued while others stayed afraid,
you saw the gifts of my darkness,
laughed at my hot mess,
didn't abuse your power over me,
just let me be,
knew the vicinity of you healed my rigid mould,
reality like that can't be bought or sold,
I never hunted you for more of the same,
wanted you only as you were,
I needed you that way,
never cared to change you,
begging you to come and play.
I just want to meet you where the art takes us,
let yourself go...
for me...
the worst that may occur has already gone down,
you see...we're no longer around,
we're down here on the ground,
dying from suffocation,
deprivation of ferocity,
but,
I need your velocity,
I need you just as you were back then...as you are now,
skip the watered down version of all you'd never want to say anyway,
tell me about nothing that matters out there but tell it to me and mean it,
and all I'll cherish is that you sent it,
like I always have,
write again and make it so,
speak again and make it glow,
those times spent worlds away,
I was bored of this one anyway,
you rescued while others stayed afraid,
you saw the gifts of my darkness,
laughed at my hot mess,
didn't abuse your power over me,
just let me be,
knew the vicinity of you healed my rigid mould,
reality like that can't be bought or sold,
I never hunted you for more of the same,
wanted you only as you were,
I needed you that way,
never cared to change you,
begging you to come and play.
Two
This is what I fight for
moments like these
where the ocean meets the sky
and everything in between
flashes in an instant
that lasts forever and can't be pinned down as it was never
real
or believable
unless you were one of the two
This is what I fight for
moments like these
where the ocean meets the sky
and everything in between
flashes in an instant
that lasts forever and can't be pinned down as it was never
real
or believable
unless you were one of the two
Breathing Hard
Dealing with this like death,
stealth mission forces it's way,
I'm here to stay and living under your skin,
below your shiny veneer where you feel dirty,
where the degrees pass 30,
where it pours to the floor
and leaks inside cracks,
where it's front to back,
feel my attack.
Dealing with this like death,
stealth mission forces it's way,
I'm here to stay and living under your skin,
below your shiny veneer where you feel dirty,
where the degrees pass 30,
where it pours to the floor
and leaks inside cracks,
where it's front to back,
feel my attack.
Conundrum
Is the stalking classier,
depending on sassy and sassier?
Is it same old same old,
down in the basement lurking with the critters,
pull the shutters,
but you are seen,
does a huntress make this act less obscene?
Is the stalking classier,
depending on sassy and sassier?
Is it same old same old,
down in the basement lurking with the critters,
pull the shutters,
but you are seen,
does a huntress make this act less obscene?
Fascination
Didn't want it anyway...
that's the stance it'll take...
a beckoning of sexuality that assaults rationality,
a calamity strikes at the centre of the pond,
but the memo didn't land,
nobody is home,
inhabitant is gone....
There once lived a soul that couldn't be struck,
just no one had luck,
they could sense it, wanted near it's raging eddies of knowledge of lust,
it hissed with no need of trust,
it didn't care and it didn't fear,
turn around, there's no vacancy here,
try the next one down the road,
they're receptive I'm told,
there's a taker for all there is to offer,
l'll spare my essence and bathe in it for my own measure,
for only my pleasure...
Then it fell into the world like a treasure,
perfect darkness and light biding it's time,
inching closer to the fire,
the forbidden fruit on it's mind,
it liked being the only to have trespassed intact,
it knew no one had made it in and back,
it ached for that essence of no fear,
anything goes the potent drug of choice,
in that heat the addiction bloomed,
now they're doomed,
unending fascination took longer to create than they'd assumed,
even longer to undo.
Didn't want it anyway...
that's the stance it'll take...
a beckoning of sexuality that assaults rationality,
a calamity strikes at the centre of the pond,
but the memo didn't land,
nobody is home,
inhabitant is gone....
There once lived a soul that couldn't be struck,
just no one had luck,
they could sense it, wanted near it's raging eddies of knowledge of lust,
it hissed with no need of trust,
it didn't care and it didn't fear,
turn around, there's no vacancy here,
try the next one down the road,
they're receptive I'm told,
there's a taker for all there is to offer,
l'll spare my essence and bathe in it for my own measure,
for only my pleasure...
Then it fell into the world like a treasure,
perfect darkness and light biding it's time,
inching closer to the fire,
the forbidden fruit on it's mind,
it liked being the only to have trespassed intact,
it knew no one had made it in and back,
it ached for that essence of no fear,
anything goes the potent drug of choice,
in that heat the addiction bloomed,
now they're doomed,
unending fascination took longer to create than they'd assumed,
even longer to undo.
Trent Reznor spells out my world better than I ever could...
artistic fan vid but what I REALLY love about this is the sound quality
for such a quiet part (and the best part) of the song, it's sick!
Listen and enjoy, you're welcome ;)
artistic fan vid but what I REALLY love about this is the sound quality
for such a quiet part (and the best part) of the song, it's sick!
Listen and enjoy, you're welcome ;)
