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Just an afterthought of mine
and the senseless wit came out divine
as though drunk from wine
and oh God bless
if with a Sorceress one messed
feeling cursed 
while the other played Chess

Complete

Maybe that wasn’t me
and perhaps I don’t really care
acts of intelligence
dripping with suffering allegiance...

And why not?

Left me in the trash 
abandoned utterly alone
maybe it’s not me here you see
just a remnant trying to make sense of falling embers from the tree
trying to see the truth
quite possibly I know that you hate me too
inclined to say the feeling is mutual
declined an interview 
nothing you never already knew
but one fact is certainly easy to see
here in my deadened peace
in my almost singular feat
one can love and hate someone complete
Mirage


No longer inclined to rewrite the story 
altered version was oh so gory
buttoned up with such finality
everlasting betrayal sort of comforting
like a slap the different view
forced the way
as the light fell on and cracked through
laughing at regret as a myth
cutting veils with the scythe...
Where... what... is this?
Take it all back, throw earth over it
I could live with horror
but this... oasis 
I’m listless 
this is evil bliss
Internal

Frozen in space awake
no motion for my own sake
you, the earthquake,
I’m not broken because I can’t break
I’ll absorb the shock
I’ll take a token as a keepsake
I can just breathe it
nothing dull nothing fake

Gazing into shattered layers
breaking and overtaking
been to this future before where the past knocks at the door
with all that’s in store 
don’t want to reside here anymore 
but the day breaks again
and the chain leaves a vacancy 
where a person should have been
round and round
this is now but then is then
I know the time but don’t remember when is when
don’t forget to wonder about the dead and missing
it arrives without a blessing
sweet like sin
between a foe and a friend
underneath a moment 
replaying 
unending 
failed in delaying
empty time, she hears what I’m conveying 
obeying all I’m never saying
How it Felt

Like the bait squirms
wriggles till it’s caught
pinned for the feeding
writhing and bleeding 
no one cares for what it’s needing
displayed and splayed 
it’s hopes decayed 
it awaits the raid
till it’s life is spent 
in agony alone
not a soul even missed that it went
Karma

Other times when I could be beautiful
Now swimming in my wretchedness 
I’ve been so cruel till I could no longer embody an artistic melody
could no longer melt thee
other worlds where I sunk it all in
drowning in my own sweet sin
and this place just a culmination of all the things I’ve been
not good enough or pretty enough to fit in
watching it all taken away
while others swept you, made you sway,
the price for being bad,
all the things I couldn’t have,
it’s the price I learned I’d paid.
Diving

On the tip of a skyscraper fallen into the sea
you met me
at the edge of a sword and through a crack in the door
I could have sworn he was what I waited for 
from a glance to a lost chance 
to mere circumstance
from the belly of the beast to the headstones of those at peace
I swore I felt it all release
I was in a place then landed anyplace
anywhere I could think I could roam 
no drugs but feeling stoned 
no excuses just free and alone
needing company 
near a piercing relief
I’m drifting up while falling deep
in a dimension made for me
I edge along and creep
Conditioned

Wouldn’t you like to know
for who I burn
the centre of the churn
making my stomach turn
wouldn’t you like to hear the gory details
unrefined and off the rails 
expressions by those of my kind
the substitutes are in line
blue steel
left a crater 
I’m not a hater
but no dirty talk here
used to numbing the inner invader
catch you later

The gift of you given freely
my senses exploding 
my worries imploding
glad you can’t fathom how it feels on this end
you’d run faster than the wind

Speechless

You don’t need to check before you come in
you could bring life or death 
I’d let you in
bring your burdens that you smother 
your pretence you use to cover
no need to come as a friend or lover
no need to mask anything at all 
no labels before me
they are so boring to see
no agenda of the pretender 
arrive faceless or with your stunning graces
what you offer makes my walls breach
no need for this tired world no need for speech

Fine Wine

You can’t resist being wanted
your Achilles heel
all of me you’ll greedily steal
what I offer is endless attention
utter clarity of reception 
getting drunk off the real thing
nothing quite so divine
as being considered the finest wine
In the Deep

Tarnished beyond recognition 
no more speculation 
the mold is firm and cold
it’s everything I long to hold
aching to alter boundaries 
a child to a woman in a blink
a saint to a vixen in a wink 
I can’t embrace these ideas or I’ll sink
can’t reason with this
can’t even emote let alone think

Chimera

The moment they feel the same
perfect intoxication suspended in writhing 
pinned to the depths therein 
leaving the anchor above and sinking within
no urge to swim
vicious rush  
limbs floating in the abyss 
that canvas forever missed
Open Gate

I can’t rig the game
to keep it all the same 
cheating the future by holding it hostage 
I’ve been doing that you know
it’s time I let go
being a jailer shouldn’t be the way it is 
setting it all free to be wherever it’ll be
taking out my hand
may seem like I’ll abandon
but at least when I face myself down the road
I’ll have blood free hands and I’ll understand
I know you can’t say no to me
can’t avoid me
we’re outta luck
I better shut the fuck up

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